A Teen's Guide to Life in the Uncharted Territorys
by artic strawbehry
Summary: I know I misspelled 'teritorries', but the stupid thing won't let me type anymore in the title!! Anyways, John and Aeryn's daughter is a teenager, and the whole family is back on Earth, and Rayne has to engage in a high school form of torture -- a dance.
1. The Beginning

A Teenager's Guide to Life in the Uncharted Territories Chapter 1 The Beginning  
  
"Mom!" Okay, I'm going to kill Rygel. The sneaky little frell has been in my room. again. "What, Rayne?" Mom's voice crackled over comms. "Can I shove Rygel out an airlock?" I ask, very, very sincerely. I'm also currently holding on to one ear of the little thief. "No. Now let him go. And Rygel, leave her alone or next time I might let her." His eyes widened and as soon as I let go, I discovered exactly how fast that throne sled of his could really move. Might I add, it goes pretty damn fast. Having nothing else to do to occupy time (What does everybody do around here all day anyway?) I head to the training room. That'll be fun. Okay, the sarcasm was just dripping out of that one. Well, it beats seeing how long Rygel will run from me or getting roped into fixing something. Actually, I'd really like to know how long Sparky'll run from me. Only downside is, Mom might shove me out the airlock then. So much for that. Reaching the training room, I start working on the techniques Mom's taught me. I'm actually getting pretty good at this. I can whip Dad's ass easily now and I almost beat Mom once. Keywords there; almost and once. Something else Mom has taught me is only to use fighting for self defense. That's saying a lot considering she's and ex- Peacekeeper. Dad's had a huge influence on her. She doesn't hit him for his 'frelling Erp sayings' anymore, and I think I heard her use one the other day. Impressive. When I was about three, Dad discovered the key element he had been missing about wormholes, now we visit Earth every so often. I've got some stuff from there, you know, typical (Earth) teenager stuff. CD player, CD's, clothes, a few books, etc. You should have seen the look on Mom's face when she heard some of these songs for the first time. I thought she was going to kill me. "Rayne, your presence is requested by your father in command." Damn. I have to study. Dad thinks I should get an Earth education. I'm still not quite sure why, but if it's that big of a deal, why not. "Rayne?" Dren. Forgot to respond. "On my way."  
  
~~~~  
  
Oh god. That was possibly the worst lesson he's ever given. Mom was in command, so he was only half focused on what he was teaching. That's something else I forgot to mention about life out here. They never stop staring at each other or kissing. It's highly disturbing. What fourteen- year/cycle old wants to see her parents making out? There some things you just don't want to know about your parents. Anyway, after about half an arn of half his attention, I told them to get a room and left. I think they actually laughed. I still hope they don't take me seriously. Besides, Mom's supposed to give me another lesson in flying her prowler. Speaking of. "Hey Pilot. How long until we're past the commerce planet?" "I'm not sure, but I'll let you know." "Thanks."  
  
~~~~  
  
It's been two miserable solar days. Mom, Dad, and D'Argo are all still on the planet. Have been since about three arns after I so eloquently ended my lesson. I'm assuming Dad pissed off the wrong person per usual and they're trying to find another source to procure food and such. He has a really bad habit about that. Mom keeps comming me every few arns to check on me. That's a new one. I'm bored again and my undirectional walking leads me to command. Just as I'm about to go in, I hear Chiana talking to Mom on the comms. This can't be good. I hear her say something about Scorpius and a wanted beacon. I leave command with some damn good questions for her when she gets back. Like who is this Scorpius and why are they so concerned about a wanted beacon? Mom comms me again. Looks like I can ask her sooner than I thought. They're on their way back right now. And Pilot has been ordered to starburst as soon as they've boarded. Dad must have really pissed someone off.or does it have to do with Scorpius?  
  
~~~~ 


	2. Answers and Conflicts

A Teenager's Guide to Life in the Uncharted Territories Chapter 2 Answers and Conflicts (I'm sorry, I'm fresh out of snappy titles here)  
  
A weeken after the unusual trip to the commerce plant and I still haven't asked about Scorpius. Mom and Dad seem uptight and nervous and are trying really hard not to let on that something might be wrong so I won't worry. Have I ever mentioned they can't act? All they're doing is scaring me more. Sure we've pissed people off before, but it's never elicited this kind of reaction. Everyone has become paranoid of any ship drawing near or any planet we pass. Worst part is, Mom's stopped the prowler lessons. So now I'm bored and have resorted, once again, to wandering aimlessly around Moya. I find Mom sitting alone in the central chamber with her head on the table. As soon as I have one foot in the door, she straightens up and whirls around. Her eyes are red and it's obvious she's been crying. I'm completely shocked. I don't think I've ever seen her cry before. "What's wrong, Mom?" "Come here. There are some things I need to tell you about." I go over and sit beside her at the table. Maybe I'll get some answers now. "Before you were born, not long after your father can through the wormhole, he made many powerful enemies. Crais was one of them." I looked at her incredulous. Uncle Crais? Okay, so he hates it when I call him that, but that makes it all the more appealing. "Yes. He thought your father had killed his brother, but it turned out to have been an accident. But soon Crais was the least of our problems. As you know, within a solar day of meeting your father, I was declared irreversibly contaminated by the Peacekeepers, but what you don't know is that several monens later, your father was captured by Crais and put in the hands of Scorpius." So that's how he comes in to the picture. Mom paused, looking on the verge of tears again. This must be the really horrible part of the story. "Scorpius wanted the knowledge he thought your father had of wormholes and knew of only one way to obtain it." "But I thought dad just figured that out eleven cycles ago." "He did, but Scorpius was convinced that your father could control them. Create them at will, predict their locations. He wanted to be able to do that. Can you imagine how dangerous it would be if the Peacekeepers could travel through wormholes? Scorpius had an invention. The Aurora Chair. It was used to enter someone's mind and show his or her memories. The process was incredibly painful. Your father was holding back a memory, and Scorpius thought it was about wormholes, but he couldn't have been farther form the truth. He spent days trying to probe that memory out and almost killed him in the process. Soon we found where he was being held and we went in and rescued him. Scorpius has been looking for us ever since. He's come close to catching us again before, but that commerce planet was the closest call we've ever had. He had left a wanted beacon describing both your father and I, and someone reported us. Now Scorpius isn't normal. Whatever normal is out here. He's part Sebacean, part Scarran. It's only natural that he has both Scarran and Sebacean allies. Both were alerted of our presence. We didn't know until they ambushed us in the market." Okay. I thought I was shocked before. Dad had told me about some of the adventures they'd had out here like when T'raltixx brought the weird crackers and when he had to marry a princess, but he'd never mentioned anything about the truly frightening side of the Uncharteds. "Whoa." That's all I can think of to say. I know English, Sebacean, Luxan, and Nebari, and that's all I can come up with. "Whoa is right," says Dad, having apparently come in while we were talking. He comes up behind mom and me and pulls us into a hug. "But that's all over now. We're haven't seen any sign that Scorpy knows where we are since we left the planet." I had to make a point. "But you didn't know on the planet until he ambushed you. How do you know he doesn't know where you are now?" "We don't. Not for sure anyway." Not the comforting answer I was looking for.  
  
~~~~  
  
Command Carrier: "Where are they?" A surprised tech jumped slightly as Scoripius appeared over his shoulder. "They're just metras away from the Scarran fleet." "Excellent. Alert the fleet." "Already been done, sir."  
  
~~~~  
  
"Commander Crichton, Aeryn, please come to command. There's something you need to see." Dad reluctantly let go of Mom and me. He wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her forehead before leading her out of the room. Now I get to sort through all this information I've gotten about the history my parents have out here. Kinda scary. Actually, a little more than kinda scary. Completely disarming is more like it. Suddenly the comms crackled to life. "Rayne, listen to me," came Dad's voice. "There's a Scarran fleet right in front of us and we have no way to avoid them. Chiana is coming your way and you are going to go and hide. Don't come out until Pilot tells you it is safe. No matter what you hear, stay hidden. Can you do that?" I'm completely frozen. This can't be happening. "Rayne?" I have to stop doing that. "Yeah, Dad. I can do that." "Good. They should be boarding in less than 400 microts. Hurry." His tone is urgent and I can hear Mom and D'Argo in the background shouting. "Love you." As quickly as the connection had begun, it ended. Just microts later Chiana showed up at the door and beckoned me to follow her. We ran through some of the more maze-like parts of Moya before reaching the innermost regions and finding a small spot where no Scarran would fit and enough curves so a shot wouldn't be able to reach us. Not 20 microts after we were hidden, the Scarrans boarded.  
  
~~~~ 


	3. The Dren Hath Hittith the Atmospheric Sc...

A Teenager's Guide to Life in the Uncharted Territories  
  
Chapter 3  
  
The Dren has Hitith the Atmospheric Scrubbers  
  
I don't know how long Chiana and I have been down here. All I know is that the fear I felt when Dad first told me about the Scarrans has multiplied by the microt. A while ago Chiana opened the comms so we could hear what was going on. All we could hear was static. Soon the events from the day hit me, the adrenaline wore off and I realize exactly how tired I am. I curl into a ball, something I learned from Dad, and put my back to the wall, a precautionary measure I learned from Mom. The next thing I know, Pilot is informing us that the Scarrans have left Moya and it's safe to come out. My haze-filled mind snaps to attention when reminded of everything that's been happening. "Pilot? Where are my parents?" The pause following my question unnerves me.  
  
"Aeryn is in command, but Commander Crichton was taken by the Scarrans," he informs me. The blood in my veins turns to ice. "Moya and I will do everything within our power to get him back, Rayne."  
  
I choke back a sob. I'm not the only one who feels deeply about this. "Thanks, Pilot." Wordlessly Chiana pulls me into her arms for a few microts before taking my hand and leading me out of our hiding spot.  
  
~~~~  
  
I don't know what I was expecting to see when I reached command, but what I saw was definitely not it. D'Argo was on one side of the room at the base of a wall with a nasty looking gash on the side of his head. Chiana runs to him. Further inspection reveals Mom. At first I didn't see her for the table that's between her and me and keeping her pinned to the wall. Something between a choking sob and strangling gasp escapes my lips as D'Argo goes over to move it. Between the three of us, we move it enough to get her out and lay her on the floor. Chiana had commed Jool and by the time Mom was free, she was there checking over her injuries. I backed up until I bumped into the wall, not wanting to believe that this was happening. Vaguely I hear myself asking if she'll be all right.  
  
"She should be fine in a few solar days. She needs lots of rest right now," Jool tells me after ordering D'Argo to take her to the medical bay. I follow, unwilling to let her leave my sight, fearing that this is a dream and she too was captured. When she is lying on the bed and everyone else is long gone, I allow myself to move from the corner where I had taken residence and lay beside her, careful not to touch anywhere that might cause her pain. Before long I joined her in a relatively peaceful slumber.  
  
~~~~  
  
It was several solar days before Mom woke up. Those days were spent either working out or listening to really loud music. Basically, trying to forget that anything bad was happening, aka, denial. It was several arns into the sleep cycle when Mom wok up. "Rayne?"  
  
I sat up quickly and grabbed my comms. "Mom?"  
  
"Are you all right?"  
  
She's been unconscious for four solar days and she asks if I'm all right. Go figure. "I'm fine, Mom."  
  
"And your father?"  
  
Oh, frell. "I'm going to come to the medical bay, Mom. I'll be there in a microt." Now how was I going to tell my mother that Dad was in Scarran custody? When I got to the door, I paused to collect my breath and my thoughts. I took a deep breath and stepped in. She wasn't lying on the bed as I had expected. She was pacing the length of the room. "Mom," I asked tentatively.  
  
She stopped pacing and ran over to me, pulling me into her arms. "They took your father didn't they?" she asked into my shoulder.  
  
I nodded, unable to form words. Together Mom and I sank to the floor and cried. Tomorrow we'd figure out how to get him back.  
  
~~~~ 


	4. Transmissions, Training, and Breaking In

A Teenager's Guide to Life in the Uncharted Territories Chapter 4 Transmissions, Training, and Breaking In  
  
Command Carrier:  
"Sir, we just received word from the Scarrans. They have John Crichton."  
"Excellent, I'll go at once."  
  
~~~~  
  
It's amazing how life-changing events change your life. Okay, so that redundant, but you know what I mean. It's amazing how much it changes everything. One day we're floating along in space, the next, we're searching desperately for a fleet of Scarrans. Go figure. "Mom, what are we going to do when we find the Scarrans?"  
"We aren't doing anything, you're staying here."  
Okay, now that's not fair. "Why do I have to stay here?"  
She turned to look at me. "Because you're too young to go."  
"But I'm fourteen."  
"Exactly the problem. Fourteen is much too young. I didn't go on my first mission until I was sixteen cycles."  
"How are you going to get inn undetected?"  
"We'll figure that out once we get there."  
"Aren't you always telling me you have to have a well shaped plan of action before acting on it?"  
"Yes, but this is much different."  
"How? You want to get yourself and everyone else captured along with Dad? I'm sure that'll help get him out."  
"Rayne, go to your quarters."  
"What?"  
"You heard me, now go."  
I turned and walked off. I'm too old to be sent to my quarters. Course, if I told her that, she'd say I was too old to be arguing with my superiors. Technically they're not my superiors because they're ranks are still in their various home worlds/ships. That's beside the point though. All this pondering while walking had led me to command. "Hey Pilot, could you do me a favor?"  
"Certainly, Rayne."  
"Can you monitor transmissions to and from the Scarrans when we get closer?"  
"I'll see what I can do."  
"Thanks, Pilot." Now off to my quarters. Joy.  
~~~~  
A half arn later, Mom came to my quarters. "Rayne, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have sent you here. Tension is running high in high in everyone."  
"Yeah, I know, Mom. It's all right. I completely understand."  
"We found the Scarrans."  
"So, when are you leaving?"  
"Tomorrow. A few arns after the sleep cycle starts."  
"Good luck, not that you'll need it."  
"Thank you," she replied before leaving.  
"Pilot, got anything interesting from the Scarrans yet?"  
"Not yet, Rayne."  
"Could you have the transmissions over my comms?"  
"I believe I could do that."  
"That way I can listen, and you can concentrate on more important things."  
"That's very considerate of you, Rayne."  
"You're doing a favor for me, least I can do is most of the work."  
"Scarran communication in ten microts." The next several arns I spent listening to the Scarrans. I was about to fall asleep when I heard one address Scorpius.  
"Do you have Crichton?"  
"Of course, do you think us incapable?"  
"Not in the least. I know how, resilient, his crew can be. Now, when can I retrieve him?"  
"How close are you?"  
"I'll be there in two hundred microts."  
"Alone?"  
"No, I have a small regiment with me."  
"They will stay aboard your ship. I will have Crichton brought to you."  
"Fine."  
Oh frell. This is not good. "Thanks Pilot, I've heard enough."  
"Connection closed."  
"Can you tell me where my mom is?"  
"She's in her quarters."  
I sprinted to her quarters and made it in record time. "Mom?"  
"Rayne, why aren't you in bed. The sleep cycle started two arns ago."  
"I was listening to Scarran transmissions."  
"What?"  
"I figured I could get some information that way."  
She sighed. "And did you?"  
"Yes."  
"Well, what is it?"  
"Scorpius is coming to get Dad from the Scarrans in about one hundred fifty microts."  
All color drained from her face. "Frell." She opened up the comms. "D'Argo, Chiana, change in plans. Scorpius is coming to get John, we'll have to follow him and get John wherever Scorpius takes him. Meet me in command in twenty microts, we have to see where the bastard is taking him."  
In all my life, I don't think I've ever heard Mom say that.  
"Come on, Rayne."  
I look at her blankly. "Come where?"  
"Command."  
~~~~  
This is probably the most bizarre sleep cycle of my life. I've been listening to them talk strategy for at least two arns while discreetly following Scorpius. So far the plan they have is that Mom will go in and try to get him out, while everyone else stays on Moya. That's not going over well with anyone but Mom. I have a thought, but Mom would kill me for suggesting it. Oh well, it's better than listening to them bicker for another two arns. "I have an idea." Everyone in command turns to look at me. "What? Should I not have an idea?"  
"What's you're idea, Rayne." Mom asks. At least they're going to hear me out.  
"Okay, well, obviously only you can get in undetected since you're ex- Peacekeeper. It's going to take more than just you to get him out. We all know that. So what if you took D'Argo or Chiana in, saying you found them on a commerce planet nearby. That gets two of you in and to the confinement center." They all continue starring at me. "What is it now? Do I have something on my face?"  
"That's a better idea than any I could have come up with," says Chiana. That's a good sign.  
"She truly is John's daughter," D'Argo replies.  
"What do you mean by that?"  
"You're father always comes up with the plans that no one else would have. The ones that sounds crazy, but usually work out in the end," he explains.  
Okay, so it was a compliment. Mom still hasn't said anything.  
"It would have to be D'Argo, he's stronger and will give us a better advantage. But it would be nearly impossible for one Peacekeeper to capture a Luxan alone," she says, sending a pointed look to all of us.  
"There'd have to be at least two to catch an off-guard Luxan," Chiana says.  
  
I think I know where Mom's going with this and I don't like it at all.  
"You up for it, Ryane?"  
I look blankly at her. "This is a joke, right? You just said a few arns ago I couldn't go."  
"That was when I thought we'd be up against Scarrans. This will be a much simpler mission."  
She's not kidding. Oh frell.  
"Yeah, I'm up for it. What do I have to do?"  
That's not me talking. Wait a minute. Since when does my mouth not obey? Since now apparently.  
"We'll leave tomorrow. Right now we all need to go rest." Everyone nods and heads various directions to their quarters except for Mom and myself. "Are you sure you want to do this?" she asks me.  
"Is there another option that will work?"  
"Not that I can think of."  
"Then I don't really have a choice do I?"  
She looks at me, studies me. "You're much more mature than I ever was at fourteen cycles."  
"Growing up out here kinda does that to you."  
"I know I don't say it enough, like your father does, but I love you. You know that right?"  
"Of course I know that, Mom. I love you too."  
She turns to leave, but she pauses when she reaches the door. "Meet me in the training room tomorrow and arn before breakfast. We have some serious training to do to get you ready for this." Then she continues out the door. I stand there for a few microts longer before retreating to my quarters to try to sleep.  
~~~~  
I'm in the training room exactly one arns before breakfast. Mom's already there. "We're going to start with how to hold a pulse rifle. I'm going to teach you how to shoot, then do everything in my power to keep you from having to."  
I nod. I can see why it would be important for me to know the proper mechanics of a pulse rifle. For that arn we work solely on pulse rifles. We break for breakfast. Chiana made pancakes. I didn't know you could make pancakes out here. I remember them from earth, and how much I love them. She says she made them since we all liked them and would need something other than food cubes to fill our stomachs. After we've eaten our fill, Mom and I go back to the training room and work on pulse rifles for another half arn. Then we spar for two arns. After that, we all meet in command.  
"We'll leave in three arns," Mom says. I think I have rattlers in my stomach. When I get back to my quarters, (I took the long way) Mom is there, laying out a uniform on my bed. When I clear my throat, she turns around. "Now we discuss proper disposition." For the next arn, I learn how to act to be a believable Peacekeeper.  
"How are you going to explain what a fourteen cycle old was doing off base?"  
"I'll figure that out when the question is asked."  
"What if they ask me?"  
"Rayne, they won't. You look much older than fourteen cycles, as much as I hate to admit it. Whatever happens, whatever is said, let me do the talking."  
"I think I can manage."  
"I'll meet you by the Prowler in and arn."  
I walk over to the bed and examine the uniform. It looks well used. I wonder momentarily where she got it. Then I shove all thoughts out of my head. I shower and put on the uniform, again wondering about its origins. My arn is almost up when I leave my quarters and head towards the Prowler.  
~~~~  
"Good luck, all of you." Says Pilot right before we cut off communications. The base is now visible on a seemingly deserted planet. The only sign of life is the Prowlers and various other PK ships going to and from. Soon we've landed. As Dad would say, "Let the games begin."  
Mom gets out first followed by D'Argo and myself. D'Argo has on PK issue handcuffs and is led by Mom and followed by me. We make it down three corridors before we are stopped. It's a young soldier who demands to know where we are going with a Luxan. Mom explains how we captured him on a commerce planet during a mission and how we're taking him to a cell. He buys the story and leaves us to continue. So far so good. We make it to the prison area with no further complication. Once there, we remove the handcuffs and start looking for Dad. After searching all the cells on our floor, Mom declares that method a waste of time. She tells D'Argo to stay with me before leaving in search of someone named Gillina. Once she's gone and D'Argo and I are hidden, I ask D'Argo how she knows Gillina will help us.  
"Gillina knows your father," he explained vaguely.  
"Did she help the last time Scorpius had Dad?"  
He looked surprised that I knew of Dad's previous capture. "Yes. He would not have gotten out if not for her." This seems to be all the explanation I'm going to receive so I stop asking questions. Soon, we hear footsteps coming our way. Soon I hear Mom's voice calling softly for us. D'Argo determines it's safe to leave and goes out first. When I come out, I see Mom standing with a blonde woman. She's shorter than Mom by a little, and is dressed in a tech's clothes. She's telling Mom where Dad most likely is, and what she can do to create a diversion. Mom thanks her and soon she's gone. "Come on, he's being held three levels down." We head off, with Mom leading the way and D'Argo bringing up the rear. When we reach the correct level, we start running into problems in the form of soldiers, guards. Mom and D'Argo take them out while I stand behind them, watching their backs. Now we have to hurry. The shooting probably caught someone's attention and we can't afford any more confrontations. We've checked half the cells without success when six more soldiers appear. Mom tells me to keep checking for Dad while they take care of them. I run, glancing in cells as quickly as I can. Finally I see him. The door is locked not surprisingly. I use the pulse rifle to fix that slight problem. Dad is already by the door, ready to go when I open it. The look of shock on his face would have been much more enjoyable had it come at a more opportune time.  
"Rayne? What are you doing here? Where's your mother?" I point down the hall where the shots are coming from. "Give me the gun," he says before taking off down the hall. Oh great, more running. I follow and soon we're all running back to the Prowler. How we're all going to fit I'm not sure.  
~~~~  
The trip back to Moya was rather uneventful with the exception of Mom telling me to drive. Dad and I looked at her like she'd grown a second head. But she was serious. When she moved to the back with Dad, I decided to let them have their time together.  
Back on Moya, I could hear Dad yelling at Mom about letting me go down. Of all the things I've heard them do (insert banging head on wall here) yelling is not one of them. I snuck to the door and sat, listening. I felt incredibly guilty, if not for my plan, Mom wouldn't be getting yelled at. I stood up and walked to the doorway. Dad had his back to me, but Mom saw me. She had tears glistening in her eyes, threatening to fall at any time. Dad turned to see what she was looking at. He stopped yelling and just looked at me. "It's not her fault I went. I came up with a plan, and it required someone else that could pass for a Peacekeeper. Don't yell at her. If you want to yell at someone, yell at me."  
He kept looking at me, trying to decide what to do. He decided on hugging me. Where that came from, I'm still not sure. He apologized to Mom and hugged her. The tears came rolling down her checks. He started kissing her hair and whispering to her. I left quietly and returned to my quarters. Dad was miraculously safe. The entire operation went much more smoothly than I had expected. When I sat down on the edge of my bed, I realized I hadn't slept in far too long. I lay down and almost immediately I was asleep. 


	5. You Must Be Kidding Me

A Teenager's Guide to Life in the Uncharted Territories  
  
Chapter 5  
You Must Be Kidding Me  
The next day after everyone but Mom, Dad and I had left the central chamber, Dad announced that we were going back to visit Earth.  
"What?" Okay, this was a major change from the dad I know.  
"We're going to earth next monen," he repeated.  
"John, are you sure that's a good idea?"  
"I'm positive. We haven't been in several cycles, why not now?"  
"Because just yesterday you were on a Peacekeeper base," I replied.  
"You sound just like your mother," he tells me, earning him a slap on the shoulder from her. "All the more reason to go. We're far enough away from him so that a starburst farther into the Uncharteds would go unnoticed so we can go through a wormhole."  
"All right," Mom concedes.  
"Sounds like fun," I reply, only half serious. I just love Earth. Cough, cough. I head back to my room and grab my CD player and a Sheryl Crow CD. I head to the training room to work off some extra energy. That's where Mom found me an arn later.  
"Do you really want to go to Earth?"  
"Sure, why not?" I answer.  
"Come on, you need a routine to do everyday. We need to work on some of these skills."  
~~~~  
True to his word, Dad's taking us to Earth. We're sitting in his module, the only vehicle we ever take, waiting for the wormhole. I'm starting to agree with Mom, this truly is a piece of dren, especially compared to the Prowler. The one good thing about going to Earth is the government goes all out for us. They give us money galore and a cabin by a lake as well as anything else we want. I think they're afraid of us. Whatever the reason, we get stellar treatment while we're here. We landed, causing massive amounts of confusion at IASA and NASA. That's probably my favorite part. It's so amusing to listen to adults shouting out useless orders to Dad. Every time they tell us to wait for the jets that will accompany us down to the ground, and every time he ignores them. You'd think they'd get the idea by now. Within two arns- hours, we're settled in the cabin. It's in the middle of nowhere to discourage the media. Dad suggests swimming. Again Mom and I look at him like he's gone farboht. If you haven't noticed, we do that a lot. Somehow he convinces us, and next thing I know, I'm up to my waist in freezing cold water. It's about midday and the sun is directly overhead. At least Mom and I don't have to worry about heat delirium in the water. We stay out on the lake until it starts to get dark. Then Dad tells us we have to go in because he's made reservations for himself and Mom for dinner.  
"What am I supposed to do while your gone?" I asked.  
"Rayne, you have uninterrupted Internet access and over six hundred TV channels, you'll find something to do," he tells me. "Just stay inside and out of trouble. And don't let anyone in."  
I look at him and sarcastically say, "Yeah, Dad, like I'm really going to let anyone in. You know, since I'm such a people person and there are so many people around."  
He and Mom laugh. I didn't think it was all that funny. "Good point," he concedes.  
He has such a way with pointing out the obvious. "When do you expect to be back?" I ask.  
"No later than eleven."  
"Okay, bye." Once they're gone, I take a long bath, another perk to being on Earth. When the water starts getting cold, I get out and order a pizza. I pity the person who's delivering. IASA's probably going to be pissed that I'm giving someone directions here, but I really don't care. Then I flop onto the couch and start looking for a good movie. I finally settled on "Armageddon". I laughed my ass off through the entire thing. Well, most of it anyway. Seeing space through the perspective of humans that haven't been there was just too funny. I think I scared the pizza guy. I don't know, maybe he saw the module in the yard, or the pulse rifle I've started wearing. Go figure, these guys scare easily. He even ran off before I could pay him. Oh well, his loss. When "Armageddon" was over (decent movie might I add) I resigned myself to flipping channels. Apparently I fell asleep because the next thing I remember is Dad picking me up and carrying me to my bed. Guess I was more tired than I thought.  
~~~~  
When I woke up, I could hear my parents in the kitchen. Grudgingly I got up, dressed and headed in to see what we were doing today.  
"We're going shopping," Dad told me.  
Oh goody. Yep, you guessed it, more sarcasm. The only thing I like to shop for is music and equipment for playing music. What can I say, I have a one track mind. "Do we have to?" I ask.  
"Yes," Mom replied. Damn. "You need some new clothes." Dren. "And you need a haircut." Frell. Not the hair. I happen to like my hair how it is, thankyouverymuch. I begged. I pleaded. They resisted.  
"I thought all teenage girls liked to shop. God knows my sisters did." Dad said.  
"I'm not a normal teenage girl, by any definition." I reminded him.  
"You got that right," I thought I heard Mom say under her breath. My suspicions were confirmed when Dad tried not to laugh.  
"Besides, you need something nicer than that for tonight," Dad casually mentioned, well, tried to.  
"Why? What's tonight?" I asked, fully confused now.  
"A dance at a local high school," he said nonchalantly.  
I looked at him like he'd lost it for the umpteenth time. "You're kidding, right?" I asked.  
"Afraid not," he informed me. "Our good friends at IASA called me this morning and said they thought you should get to have the experience of going to a dance."  
Damn. They knew about the pizza guy. "And this means I have to go, why?"  
"Because they're attempting to be nice," Mom said, effectively ending that conversation.  
"What do teenagers wear to dances?" I asked, wanting to know how bad this was going to be.  
Dad looked at Mom, almost like he was scared. "It's a formal dance, so that means-"  
"No. Absolutely not. You will not make me wear a dress." Fast-forward three arns. I'm standing in hideous dress number six with a little old sales lady asking me if that one was any better. I gave Mom a look, begging her to get me out of this new form of torture. I despise dresses.  
"Why don't you try the next one, honey," Mom says, trying hard not to laugh.  
See, even she hates this one. I retreat to the dressing room and discard that one. The next one has more promise. It's midnight blue, plain, with thin, black straps and comes down to my ankles. I think we have a winner. Mom thinks so too. Now for shoes. God help me.  
Another two arns- frell- hours, later I have the dress, the shoes, and I'm short half an inch of hair. Mom refuses to let Dad see my dress, or hers for that matter. Oh, I forgot to mention that. My parents will be joining me at the dance. This just keeps getting better and better. The plus side is, I got a frelling awesome leather duster. It's a lot like Mom's, only not PK issue. Now it was time for the fun part. Music store, baby.  
I spent arns in there. I think I bought around five hundred bucks worth of stuff in there. On the card IASA gave us. Payback is a bitch, but damn it's fun.  
~~~~  
When we got back to the cabin, we went swimming.again. The dance didn't start until 9:30 (what is wrong with these people?) so we had plenty of time. Actually, I was trying to put off getting ready as long as possible. Unfortunately Mom caught on. She led my back to my room. "Now, put your dress on. I'll be back in five minutes." Damn. She wasn't going to let me out of this. You'd think she'd have pity seeing as she hates dresses as much as I do. True to her word, she came back after exactly five minutes. She had her dress on also. It was black silk, definitely expensive (no doubt to piss off our 'good friends' at IASA), and like mine, plain. Her hair was down, extremely rare, and was that makeup? Oh no. No. What's that in her hand? Oh frell. Now I have to wear makeup?! I know they're kidding now. Mom saw my distress.  
"Don't worry, only dark eye shadow." Okay, so maybe it wouldn't be that bad. Half an hour (Yay! I got it right this time!) later my long, dark hair was straight and down and I was finally ready to go.  
  
~~~~  
Let me know if you like it people! I'm not going to keep posting unless I get some reviews. Thank you to all the people who have reviewed already! 


	6. The Dance aka The Night Sarcasm Abounds

A Teenager's Guide to Life in the Uncharted Territories  
Chapter 6  
The Dance (aka The Night Sarcasm Abounds)  
  
It was a forty-five minutes drive to the local high school. When we (finally) got there people were already dancing. Or what I'm going to assume is their idea of dancing, aka, standing there talking. Maybe it's just me, but if you go to a dance, it seems kinda appropriate to actually dance. Apparently, that was lost on them since they continued to stand there, that is, until they saw us. They all started whispering and 'discretely' pointing at us. Guess word got out Mom and I aren't from around here. Damn. And I was hoping I could have one night of 'normalcy', whatever that is. Thankfully, unbeknownst to Mom and Dad, I brought my CD player. It's hidden in my bag, begging for use. Who am I to deny a good product use? I found a nice, dark corner (which was actually kinda hard to do with all the unnatural colors of light going everywhere) and settled in for the long two hours. I was only half surprised when Mom didn't come looking for me when I hadn't been seen for an hour. Then I realized the couple everyone was pointing at in the corner was my parents. Wonderful. I also noticed a boy slightly older than myself starring at me. Terrific. I'm having such fun. The bleachers where everyone has piled their stuff catch my eye. This is has possibilities. I gather my stuff and go lay down on the top. Now maybe I can make better use of my time, translation; nap. I was almost asleep when two girls came over to me. Dear god. Now what?  
"Andrew is starring at you." One girl said, as if I didn't know that myself.  
"Yeah, I noticed," I replied raising my eyebrows slightly.  
"He never stares at girls." The other one said.  
Like I care. "Are you going anywhere with this?" I ask. Frankly, they're starting to get on my nerves.  
"We think you should dance with him."  
So that was it. I was coerced into this and now I get to dance with a guy who probably just wants to dance because I'm not from around here. This keeps getting better and better.  
"If I say yes, will you two go away?" Maybe they'll get the message.  
"Yes." They're so frelling happy. What is their problem?  
"Fine. I'll dance with Andrew. Happy?" Those smirks are getting awfully annoying.  
"Very. And we're sure he will be too," the first one said.  
Kill me now. Please. I'm begging. Maybe he'll forget. Doubtful, but work with me here. I got optimism from my Dad and the wonderful pessimism from Mom. Amazing how well they work together isn't it? The girls go over and tell him that I'll dance with him. They obviously don't mention that they had to annoying the frell out of me first. He smiles. I grimace. Whimper. Might as well get this over with. I walk over, and look him over. Not bad actually.  
"You wanna dance," I ask. Just my luck, the pulsing music changes into a slower song. The powers that be are really intent on making me suffer aren't they?  
"Yes," he answers. We stand there awkwardly for a microt before he puts his arms around my waist. I unwillingly put my arms around his neck. This isn't as bad as I thought. It doesn't hurt that he's cute. Cute in that adorable puppy kinda way. Whoa. Wait. Rewind. I just compared him to a puppy. This music must be messing with my head. I plead temporary insanity. "So, what's your name?"  
"Rayne."  
"Unique name, huh?"  
"Yeah."  
"You're parents must really like rain."  
"When I was born, my mom had only seen rain once, and my dad figured out that if you rearranged the letters in my mom's name, you could spell rain. Granted it's not the traditional spelling, but it works."  
"You're that alien girl everyone's talking about?"  
"You didn't know?"  
"Well, I do now. You seem so normal."  
"Gee, thanks."  
"I didn't mean it like that."  
"Okay."  
"Are you mad?"  
I give him a look. "I've known you for all of two minutes, no I'm not mad.yet."  
"Good."  
"Good?"  
"I'm glad."  
"Why?" He's starting to get annoying.  
"Because I really like you."  
"How can you tell you really like me? You've known me as long as I've known you."  
"I'm not sure. But I do."  
"You sound exactly like my dad."  
"Is that good or bad?"  
"That all depends." Now I know how Mom feels. I can't decide if I'd rather hit him or hug him. Granted I am technically in his arms. Okay, this isn't helping my argument.  
"On?"  
"The situation he's in."  
"Ah. What would your dad do in this situation?"  
"Well, he's over there in the corner with my mom," I said, motioning to the corner where people were still pointing at.  
"Wow. Are they always that bad?"  
"Yeah. More or less." Unfortunately.  
"That sucks. Big time."  
  
"Yeah. They're pretty cool when they're not doing that."  
"That's good."  
"How about your parents? Are they as bad as mine?"  
"No. Not even close."  
Just then the song ended. Damn. And I was just starting to enjoy myself.  
"Thanks for the dance."  
"No problem. We might have to do it again sometime. Soon."  
"I agree."  
Oh god. Am I flirting? I'm flirting. Help. This is bad. This is very bad. I don't flirt. Frell. Dad is going to go marga farbot. I really pity Andrew when Dad finds out about this. Either he's going to ask the secret for 'taming the female' or go after him with a pulse rifle. Neither option is appealing. The good news is that he's to busy with Mom to notice. Well, sorta a good thing. It doesn't make it any less disturbing. I'll have to talk to Mom about PDA tomorrow. Especially PDA in front of me. It's just wrong.  
"Rayne?"  
"Huh?" Frell. I did it again.  
"I asked if you wanted to keep dancing, despise the increased tempo."  
"I'd like that." Where did that come from? I didn't mean to say that. Someone find the control for my brain and take it off automatic and put it back on manual. Please. And hurry.  
~~~~  
Time has flown. There's only half and hour until this dance is over. The two girls from earlier captured Andrew and dragged him off somewhere. (I found out that their names are Carly and Shana.) I'm now lying on the bleachers. Again. This time, I actually manage to fall asleep. I'm guessing that, because one minute I'm listening to a really crappy song and the next, Andrew is putting a piece of ice on my back.  
"What was that for?"  
"You were asleep."  
"And?"  
"The dance is almost over. People are going to want their coats."  
"Your point?"  
"You were sleeping on them." I hate when people make sense.  
"Oh. I feel really smart now."  
"Don't worry about it."  
"I wasn't planning on worrying about it."  
"When are you leaving?"  
"As soon as my parents are ready."  
"No. Leaving."  
"Oh." Time for the long awkward pause now. "I'm really not sure."  
"Is there a way we can keep in touch?"  
"Well, I have e-mail, but it's monitored by IASA. And the fact that I can only read it while we're here."  
"Oh."  
"If you give me your number, I can call you tomorrow. And whenever I come back." Oh frell. I just asked for his number.  
"That works."  
And he agreed. Oh frell. This is still bad. I can't like him. I haven't known him long enough to like him. Frell. I have to talk to Adaria. She's DK's daughter. She's my age and she's the closest thing I have to a sister and best friend. I only get to talk to her once twice a cycle, which really sucks. This calls for a major consultation. She'll know what to do. She's really good with guys from what I remember.  
"Here you go."  
"Thanks. I'll call you tomorrow."  
"You'll call who tomorrow?"  
Oh frell. Please don't let Dad be with her, please don't let Dad be with her. I turn to face the speaker, my mom. Thankfully, Dad is nowhere to be seen.  
"I sent him off to help clean up."  
"Thank you. So much."  
"Who is this?"  
Damn.  
"Mom, this is Andrew."  
"Nice to meet you, Andrew."  
"Nice to meet you also."  
"Rayne, we better go before you father comes back in here. He almost saw Andrew before I sent him off."  
"Bye."  
He's so obedient. "We don't say goodbye in our family." I explain.  
"I'll talk to you soon, then."  
"I'll talk to you soon." Mom gave me a look and I sent one right back at her. She can't be serious. As soon as we were out of hearing range I call her on it. "What was that look about?"  
"You and that boy."  
"What about you and Dad? You were in the corner the whole night!"  
She's blushing. Oh god. "Okay, I won't mention that if you don't mention Andrew."  
"All right."  
~~~~ Sorry it's been so long since I posted. The Internet has gone screwy at home and even more so at school due the fact that our connection thing (so very technical, I now) got struck by lightning. But it's all good now because it's fixed and I can get online again. As usual, let me know what you thought. Thanks for all the reviews!! 


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